It started with a very bloody and very dead rabbit on his front step.
It said something about Stiles’ life choices that the sight of something that might’ve once made him throw up, just set off a low current of dread in his stomach.
Hard to be super grossed out by a dead rabbit when you’ve been on the verge of cutting someone’s arm off.
Or seen that same person gutted on his feral uncle’s claws.
Huh.
Why did all of his grossest memories involve Derek?
He narrowed his eyes in suspicion.
This was a gross thing.
Derek must be involved.
Stiles’ secret crush on Derek was a secret.
He wished it was so secret that not even he knew about it.
Sadly, it was not the case.
He did not want weird feelings for an alpha werewolf with anger issues.
Except…
Derek was a fundamentally good person. Who’d had what Stiles would probably call the shittiest life ever.
Derek tried so hard to help and, well, sort of epically failed at it.
It was hard not to find that ridiculously endearing.
Stiles wasn’t even going to mention Derek’s face. Or his body. Or anything else.
His crush on Lydia was a good example that he cared more about what was in the package than the package itself.
Not that a good package wasn’t the whipped cream and cherry on top of his favourite milkshake.
Stiles put the dead rabbit into a garbage bag and hosed down the steps.
This was something he very much did not want his dad to know about.
Especially not if it was Derek related.
They had all these charged moments.
Sure… a lot of them involved danger and terror.
But not all of them.
It was in these moments that Stiles felt the most alive.
He was observant.
So he knew that he wasn’t the only one affected by them.
There’d be a slight hitch in Derek’s breath. He’d inhale a little too deeply. His eyes would dilate (because Derek was almost always too close).
Stiles hadn’t decided what, if anything, he wanted to do about his crush and the possibilities suggested by these moments.
“Derek? I know you’re around. Funny thing happened this morning. I open my door and find a dead rabbit. And you know who I immediately thought of? You. What does that say about you? About us? That seeing a dead animal makes me think of you. It doesn’t say anything good,” Stiles called out at the Hale house.
“Why are you here?” Derek asked. And… Stiles was a little disturbed. Okay, a lot disturbed the defeated resignation in Derek’s voice.
“Um… didn’t you hear me? Because you left a dead rabbit and I want to know why? The only thing I can think of is… um, well, that maybe you’re trying to woo me in some weird werewolf way?” Stiles said.
“Yes. And you rejected me. So why come and mock me for it? Give me a little time and space. I’ll get over it,” Derek listlessly said. Almost pleading.
“I… rejected you. Because I threw it away. But I only threw it away because it was gross. Normal people give flowers or something! Why wouldn’t you just ask me out on a date?” Stiles asked, exasperated.
“I’m not a normal person,” Derek growled, “I don’t want to date you, I want to mate you.”
“But I’m human. So can’t we do this the human way? You can give me flowers and take me out to dinner?” Stiles hopefully asked.
“No,” Derek said.
“No? No!?” Stiles flailed, “What does that mean? No, we can’t do things the human way? Why not?”
“Every time I’ve tried in the past, it’s ended horribly for me. You’re the first person I’ve been interested in who isn’t a hunter and knows what I am. Why bother pretending I’m human when I’m not? If you want dates and flowers, date a human,” Derek shrugged.
“And… that’s it? We do it your way or nothing? How is that fair?” Stiles demanded.
Derek raised a brow, “Hypocritical, don’t you think? You’re telling me we do it the human way or nothing.”
Stiles was stumped because he kind of was, “Well… couldn’t we start with dates and then move onto werewolf wooing?”
Derek shook his head, “Already said I don’t want to do the human thing. It’s fine, Stiles. I’ll get over it and you’ll have so many chances to date at college and beyond. You’re so bright, smart, and pretty. You’ll be fine.”
Stiles watched as Derek left.
He wasn’t sure where to go from there.
Stiles’ crush hadn’t gone anywhere. He also wasn’t clear if Derek had rejected him or if he’d rejected Derek.
Both? Derek had turned him down for human dating and Stiles had turned Derek down for werewolf marriage.
Only the supernatural was capable of giving Stiles this kind of headache.
Stiles left for college with nothing resolved.
He had every intention of playing the field and finally trying out the whole dating thing.
He was a lot more successful than he’d imagined he could be.
Apparently… he was hot. To an unexpectedly large amount of people.
So he dated. Even had a few short relationships.
Turns out…
It was hard when you had to hide a huge portion of your life.
Almost impossible to achieve any real intimacy when you obviously didn’t trust the person enough to be open and honest with them.
And Stiles wanted that.
Stiles also had a few dates with werewolves, since they always managed to peg him for a human in the know.
Those werewolves had been just as intense as Scott had immediately been about Allison.
As Derek had been about him.
Looked like going in hard and deep was totally a werewolf thing.
It honestly kind of sucked and made him feel hollow and empty.
Derek was tense as he opened his door. He could smell blood on the other side.
He found a dead rabbit. Throat cut with a knife, not with claws.
He could smell Stiles all over the rabbit.
He faintly felt a bright and surprised smile turn his lips upwards.
On Derek and Stiles’ first ‘date’ they ate rabbit stew.
It was delicious.